Today is a day, in which I have decided to end my Mexican adventure. Last week in Tulum I lost my debit card and do not have another way to receive cash (Mexico is a cash only land), other than having someone western union me every time and that is not really an option, so without further delay I head back to the US. It took me a week of thinking to come to this and even now I am not sure. I have been living recklessly for the past 5 weeks and between the bugs, drugs, and work my body is ravished with cuts and scrapes I have a bruises both inside and out. Even as I type this I am covering a 3 inch scrape on my forehead from a poorly planned jump off an observation tower into less than 2 feet of water. The moment my head hit the ground my mind became clear and most likely concussed. What ever it was that was in my system is out, I can not keep living like this right now. I still do not want to head home, but without other options, I will. Maybe if I had a better grasp of the language I could keep going as a drifter living off coconuts with a hand out, but I know now what I want, a better life. Living in reckless abandon getting molested by strangers and going full bore into life is great, but at the end of the day my life is at best empty and void of meaning. I have said before and will repeat it again, I want more from this life, I really would like a partner to share this adventure with and while it would be nice if it was a romantic partner, I am now starting to think any partner would be great. I want to once again as I did when I was younger look at someone in the morning and go, "remember last year when we did that crazy shit". Maybe its time for the drifter to head in from the cold. As my new online dating profile title reads "this stray dog needs a forever home"
I love you guys take care.